Friday, 13 April 2012

Well that didn't happen, did it...

Now, I know that I said that I would get on the scales last night and post that information straight away... and I know that I didn't.  But I've got a really, really good excuse. But I'm going to build up to it...

I got home from work pretty early yesterday - it must have been about quarter to four. It was still the afternoon, really. Wife was already home - she'd been to the dentist, and her jaw and the side of her face was still numb. Listening to her attempting to speak was pretty hilarious. But she was busy making a lasagne, so I said that I would take Dog out for a walk - a nice long walk that would be guaranteed to tire him out.

So Dog and I jump into the van, and head for Silksworth Lake - an area around the ski slope. We park up, get out, and start walking. And man, that dog. He was straining at the lead, going nuts when other dogs were around, sniffing at the grass constantly, staring intently at the ducks, barking at some dogs... He's usually very placid, so I have no idea what got into him.

We walk around the big lake, and then head over to the smaller lake, where some guys are dotted around fishing. Circling the lake, we climb the steps that bring you out at the Community Pool - and when we get to the top of the steps, Dog is knackered. Fantastic. So we stroll back to the van, and head home. Mind you, this walk has lasted about an hour - it doesn't sound much when it's written down, but it was long. My calves were burning.

We get home, Dog goes out in the garden for a bit of a forage, and I have a terrible sensation in my stomach. I know what's coming, and it is going to be bad.

I make a beeline for the toilet, drop pants, get on seat, and boosh. A volcanic eruption of diarrheaic waste of biblical proportions. It pretty much lifted me off of the seat, and I'm telling you, that torrent was like a tsunami of waste that would hit both the Richter scales and the Geiger counters.

Anyway, apocalyptic bowel movements complete, I got ready for my dinner - fish, carrots, and boiled potatoes. Sat down to eat, watched Alcatraz (anyone else watching it? What do you think? It seems okay, but still early days...) and then got to the next part of the evening... I set about tidying the house. We've got company on Friday, so I wanted to get some things sorted - Dog had brought mud into the kitchen, so I sorted that. The living room needed vacuuming, so I did that. The leather sofa needed treating, so I did that.

By now, it's 10pm (I know, where DOES the time go?) and I decided to weigh myself. So I get out my electronic weighing devices (that's the Wii Fit Balance Board), go to power up the Wii... and the remotes are dead. Hunt around for some batteries... no dice. So I put some batteries on charge, and reluctantly have to wait until today to weigh myself.

So tonight, after the company has left, and once I'm full with lasagne, alcohol, cakes, chocolate and other nice things... I will weigh myself.

Am I ever going to lose weight? Yeah, I'm not too sure either...

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