Yup, put on the Wii. Stepped on the balance board. Watched the meter soar.
14 stone. 10 pounds.
Damn damn damn damnation.
More on this story later.
The Dieting Man
Tuesday, 1 May 2012
Thursday, 26 April 2012
Ooops, I Skipped A Day...
Yesterday was hectic. I mean, most days are busy, but yesteday was HECTIC. Mind if I talk about it? Okay, here goes.
Full day of work. Up at 6.15, left at 7.30, work from 7.45. At lunchtime, nipped to the local DIY store for supplies. Washed van. Waxed van. Back out to work. Back in at 16.15. Far too wet to weed the front garden. Far too wet to take Dog for a walk. Started the mammoth task of washing up. Wife arrived. Wife in mood because of a decision that I had made during the day. (Disclaimer 1: It was not a massive decision. Disclaimer 2: I rang Wife's mobile FOUR TIMES to get her input on the decision. It rang out each time. The decision was time critical). Had dinner. Wife went to Bokwa. Mate arrived to discuss decision. Had to tell him that my earlier decision was now defunct and try to deal with the mild ramifications of that. Wife arrived home from Bokwa. Still in mood. Got her to discuss reason for decision/mood/lack of understanding with myself and mate. FINALLY issue was resolved. Went to bed. Timecheck: 12.30.
Aaaand... Breathe.
So. Yeah. A rather hectic day. The diet? Ha. Healthy eating? You're having a laugh. Exercise? Get real.
The more salient points: Drank coffee, ate multiple biscuits. Had fruit, ryvita, tuna. Had Mars bar, chocolate, snacks, Jelly Beans, Pepsi, Ice Cream.
Dammit I'm rubbish at dieting.
The Dieting Man.
Full day of work. Up at 6.15, left at 7.30, work from 7.45. At lunchtime, nipped to the local DIY store for supplies. Washed van. Waxed van. Back out to work. Back in at 16.15. Far too wet to weed the front garden. Far too wet to take Dog for a walk. Started the mammoth task of washing up. Wife arrived. Wife in mood because of a decision that I had made during the day. (Disclaimer 1: It was not a massive decision. Disclaimer 2: I rang Wife's mobile FOUR TIMES to get her input on the decision. It rang out each time. The decision was time critical). Had dinner. Wife went to Bokwa. Mate arrived to discuss decision. Had to tell him that my earlier decision was now defunct and try to deal with the mild ramifications of that. Wife arrived home from Bokwa. Still in mood. Got her to discuss reason for decision/mood/lack of understanding with myself and mate. FINALLY issue was resolved. Went to bed. Timecheck: 12.30.
Aaaand... Breathe.
So. Yeah. A rather hectic day. The diet? Ha. Healthy eating? You're having a laugh. Exercise? Get real.
The more salient points: Drank coffee, ate multiple biscuits. Had fruit, ryvita, tuna. Had Mars bar, chocolate, snacks, Jelly Beans, Pepsi, Ice Cream.
Dammit I'm rubbish at dieting.
The Dieting Man.
Tuesday, 24 April 2012
Yes, I Am A Bit Gutted
When I got on the Wii Balance Board last night, I was hoping that I would have lost about four pounds. It would seem that, in reality, I was dreaming.
But let's face the facts. My 'diet' of the past week, although including such things as tuna on Ryvita for lunch and more fruit than in the past, I have not really cut down on chocolate, sweets and snacks; and I haven't increased my exercise (apart from walking Dog).
So that leaves me with the fact that I need to try harder. I need to lessen my intake of food in general. I need to cut down my intake of sweets and sugary stuff. Stupidly, I've started drinking Pepsi with my evening meal, when I usually have water - yeah, 'cos that's the way to go when you're on a diet. And I need to do exercise. Lots and lots of exercise.
Here's the plan for exercise:
I'm going to go back to doing stuff on the Wii. That used to get me really going - heartrate through the roof, sweat pouring out of me. I'll be going on Wii Fit, and doing things like the Step exercise, Hula Hoop exercise - you know, the ones that are really active. I'm also going to go on some of the Dance programmes that I've got - I've just Just Dance 1 and Just Dance 2 and The Michael Jackson Experience. I've also got The Michael Jackson Experience for the PlayStation, as well as SingStar Dance. I'm going to have to set aside time to go on my exercise bike, which I used to do whilst playing FIFA, and I'm also going to go out on my 'real' bike and do bike rides.
You know what? I'm fat. But I am going to lose this excess weight that I am dragging around with me. You know why? Because I am The Dieting Man.
But let's face the facts. My 'diet' of the past week, although including such things as tuna on Ryvita for lunch and more fruit than in the past, I have not really cut down on chocolate, sweets and snacks; and I haven't increased my exercise (apart from walking Dog).
So that leaves me with the fact that I need to try harder. I need to lessen my intake of food in general. I need to cut down my intake of sweets and sugary stuff. Stupidly, I've started drinking Pepsi with my evening meal, when I usually have water - yeah, 'cos that's the way to go when you're on a diet. And I need to do exercise. Lots and lots of exercise.
Here's the plan for exercise:
I'm going to go back to doing stuff on the Wii. That used to get me really going - heartrate through the roof, sweat pouring out of me. I'll be going on Wii Fit, and doing things like the Step exercise, Hula Hoop exercise - you know, the ones that are really active. I'm also going to go on some of the Dance programmes that I've got - I've just Just Dance 1 and Just Dance 2 and The Michael Jackson Experience. I've also got The Michael Jackson Experience for the PlayStation, as well as SingStar Dance. I'm going to have to set aside time to go on my exercise bike, which I used to do whilst playing FIFA, and I'm also going to go out on my 'real' bike and do bike rides.
You know what? I'm fat. But I am going to lose this excess weight that I am dragging around with me. You know why? Because I am The Dieting Man.
Monday, 23 April 2012
My Current Weight
According to the Wii, my BMI is 34.93 (was 35.12) and my weight is 14 stone 9 pounds (was 14 stone 10 pounds).
More tomorrow!
More tomorrow!
Friday and the Weekend
Sounds like a dodgy pubs 'n' clubs band, doesn't it, Friday and the Weekend? Really, it's just an update on just that - my exploits since the last post.
However, I have a confession to make. It's a misleading title. Because in actual fact, I can't remember much about Friday, as it seems like a date in the distant past now. True, I went to work. I didn't do much exercise, and, for that matter, didn't do much healthy eating.
From what I can remember, I assisted Wife do the shopping after work; we visited the in-laws; we came home and ate; we went to bed.
Saturday, however, was a completely different story.
First of all, I was limping. I think I know what the problem is now, but at the time, I did not. All I knew was that my big toe was hurting like mad, it was red, swollen, and the skin was beginning to harden. And Dog biting it didn't help much...
So what's the obvious choice when you've got a bad toe and a limp? Take Dog for a massive walk along the beach in the rain, naturally. We did that, and we got drenched as a reward for our efforts. (But not as drenched as the silly surfers in the sea... idiots...)
We then had a barbecue. Yes, a barbecue. But by some divine intervention, it was dry, and indeed sunny, between 3.30 and 6.00, the exact time that we had our feast of sausages and burgers on the beach. Awesome.
So Saturday was a success, I would say. A mixture of good exercise and relatively healthy eating (apart from the Mars bar and Bounty that I consumed...)
Sunday was good too. I managed to refrain from eating lunch (I know that that's not what dieting is about, but I'm not much of a lunch person on weekends, never have been really.)
We had a lovely roast chicken dinner that Wife lovingly prepared, and then I went to Cheema's in Sunderland to play pool. It was a blast, and not just because I won.
Anyway, my mate Phil came back to ours after pool, and we sat shooting the breeze until about 12, at which point I really had to go to bed.
Meantime, I'm thinking of joining Weight Watchers. I think it will help me to be focused and may provide structure in my meal plans and eating habits.
Thoughts?
The Dieting Man.
Friday, 20 April 2012
A Bit of a Wobble, But I Didn't Fall Off...
Thursday was a dark and miserable day. The weather wasn't too good either... No, but seriously, it was chucking it down all day.
I woke up feeling like I needed another three hours in bed - that's not a good way to start the day. Wearily, I trudged downstairs and let Dog out to do what he needs to do in the garden. I looked longingly at the kettle, but turned aside and grabbed a pint glass from the cupboard and filled it with ice cold water. Aaah. Lovely. Can you feel the sarcasm?
Two plums sat on the windowsill, looking at me, desperately wanting me to eat them. I sighed, and complied with their desire. Letting Dog back in, I fed him, then sat down to my laptop to see what was what.
Book sales: None yesterday.
Kindle sales: None yesterday.
Amazon sales: None yesterday.
Total online earnings: None yesterday.
Ah. This is why I have a dayjob. Nevermind.
I prepped my lunch and snacks for the day, got ready, and headed out for work. Then I made my first mistake.
Instead of taking the apple with me on my morning round, I took the Mars bar. That was gone, devoured, digested by 8.20. I had also taken my apple with me, but after eating the Mars bar, that had about as much appeal to me as a piece of cardboard with the word 'GARBAGE' emblazoned on it.
Heading back to base, I ate my lunch - faithfully sticking to my diet of two pieces of Ryvita with tuna and pineapple. The two plums on my desk were starting to look old - so I didn't bother with them. Instead, I updated this blog, and surfed the net, until I was back out on the road. Again, I took my apple with me, but didn't bother eating it.
As I was heading home, my mate Phil called me. He was in a spot of bother with his car, in that it wasn't starting. And hadn't started for about two hours. I told him that I wouldn't be long, and about half an hour, I pulled up to his workplace in the pouring rain, opened my bonnet, and connected both our batteries together. That's right, the engine bay that I had scrubbed clean two days earlier was now getting saturated by the downpour. But it's what you do to help your mates, isn't it... Anyway, he was kind enough to provide me with a jam scone - which in all honestly, I don't usually like, but after a day of hard work, and getting drenched, was actually quite nice. We sat for a while, shooting the breeze, me trying to convince him not to get the BMW 320d Sport that he wanted to replace his Renault Clio with, and telling him instead to be sensible and go down the Vauxhall Vectra route. We'll see what he ends up doing... Me? Yeah, I'm still after an Audi. Maybe a few more sales of The Black Shadow and I'll be there...
Then Wife called me. She wanted me to grab some veggies for dinner. I was miles away from ASDA, so I had to go to Morrisons (eugh). I found the veg Wife wanted, but by the time I got to the checkouts, I had managed to acquire a box of Magnum-esque ice creams and a Bounty. Ooops. (Yes, the Bounty was devoured by the time I got back to the van).
I had a killer headache, which I'd had since 1pm, so first thing I did when I got home was chuck a couple of pills down my gullet.
Dinner consisted of a chicken kiev, boiled potatoes, and mixed veg, but I hardly touched it. I felt ill. My head was pounding, it felt like the pressure inside it was building up - I actually thought that pus was going to start leaking out of my eyes. It was terrible. I also thought I was going to puke. Death was imminent. But, the fact that I am here now writing this shows that death was clearly not imminent, and I was just feeling unwell. A cup of coffee later (sensible, what with having a headache and that), some time, a lie down on the sofa, and I felt a lot better.
Playing Assassin's Creed later that evening, I had a Magnum-esque ice cream and a few ginger nuts, then went to bed. Shockingly, it was quarter to twelve.
Really, then, I hardly ate anything. And what I did eat was pretty much unhealthy. We didn't take Dog for a walk because the weather was so bad, which means a mammoth walk is in store for me today (Friday).
I'm actually looking forward to getting on the scales on Monday, to see what the score is - plus or minus. I honestly have no idea which way it's heading. It's almost exciting. Almost.
I may possibly post an update tonight, but not sure about the weekend, it's so busy.
Have a good one, and don't indulge (too much)!
The Dieting Man.
I woke up feeling like I needed another three hours in bed - that's not a good way to start the day. Wearily, I trudged downstairs and let Dog out to do what he needs to do in the garden. I looked longingly at the kettle, but turned aside and grabbed a pint glass from the cupboard and filled it with ice cold water. Aaah. Lovely. Can you feel the sarcasm?
Two plums sat on the windowsill, looking at me, desperately wanting me to eat them. I sighed, and complied with their desire. Letting Dog back in, I fed him, then sat down to my laptop to see what was what.
Book sales: None yesterday.
Kindle sales: None yesterday.
Amazon sales: None yesterday.
Total online earnings: None yesterday.
Ah. This is why I have a dayjob. Nevermind.
I prepped my lunch and snacks for the day, got ready, and headed out for work. Then I made my first mistake.
Instead of taking the apple with me on my morning round, I took the Mars bar. That was gone, devoured, digested by 8.20. I had also taken my apple with me, but after eating the Mars bar, that had about as much appeal to me as a piece of cardboard with the word 'GARBAGE' emblazoned on it.
Heading back to base, I ate my lunch - faithfully sticking to my diet of two pieces of Ryvita with tuna and pineapple. The two plums on my desk were starting to look old - so I didn't bother with them. Instead, I updated this blog, and surfed the net, until I was back out on the road. Again, I took my apple with me, but didn't bother eating it.
As I was heading home, my mate Phil called me. He was in a spot of bother with his car, in that it wasn't starting. And hadn't started for about two hours. I told him that I wouldn't be long, and about half an hour, I pulled up to his workplace in the pouring rain, opened my bonnet, and connected both our batteries together. That's right, the engine bay that I had scrubbed clean two days earlier was now getting saturated by the downpour. But it's what you do to help your mates, isn't it... Anyway, he was kind enough to provide me with a jam scone - which in all honestly, I don't usually like, but after a day of hard work, and getting drenched, was actually quite nice. We sat for a while, shooting the breeze, me trying to convince him not to get the BMW 320d Sport that he wanted to replace his Renault Clio with, and telling him instead to be sensible and go down the Vauxhall Vectra route. We'll see what he ends up doing... Me? Yeah, I'm still after an Audi. Maybe a few more sales of The Black Shadow and I'll be there...
Then Wife called me. She wanted me to grab some veggies for dinner. I was miles away from ASDA, so I had to go to Morrisons (eugh). I found the veg Wife wanted, but by the time I got to the checkouts, I had managed to acquire a box of Magnum-esque ice creams and a Bounty. Ooops. (Yes, the Bounty was devoured by the time I got back to the van).
I had a killer headache, which I'd had since 1pm, so first thing I did when I got home was chuck a couple of pills down my gullet.
Dinner consisted of a chicken kiev, boiled potatoes, and mixed veg, but I hardly touched it. I felt ill. My head was pounding, it felt like the pressure inside it was building up - I actually thought that pus was going to start leaking out of my eyes. It was terrible. I also thought I was going to puke. Death was imminent. But, the fact that I am here now writing this shows that death was clearly not imminent, and I was just feeling unwell. A cup of coffee later (sensible, what with having a headache and that), some time, a lie down on the sofa, and I felt a lot better.
Playing Assassin's Creed later that evening, I had a Magnum-esque ice cream and a few ginger nuts, then went to bed. Shockingly, it was quarter to twelve.
Really, then, I hardly ate anything. And what I did eat was pretty much unhealthy. We didn't take Dog for a walk because the weather was so bad, which means a mammoth walk is in store for me today (Friday).
I'm actually looking forward to getting on the scales on Monday, to see what the score is - plus or minus. I honestly have no idea which way it's heading. It's almost exciting. Almost.
I may possibly post an update tonight, but not sure about the weekend, it's so busy.
Have a good one, and don't indulge (too much)!
The Dieting Man.
Thursday, 19 April 2012
I'm Getting Better (I think...)
Okay, I think that I had a better day yesterday (Wednesday). Let me talk you through it:
I got up at around 6.15, as I had tuna to prepare, and a shirt to iron. I was surprised that Dog wasn't barking, but then again, it was early even for him, and he had had a late night on Tuesday. When I went to his cage, he was awake, and looking at me bleary eyed, so I left him in there whilst I pottered around the kitchen, with my tins of John West. I opened two tins, poured some vinegar into a tupperware tub, and added two hefty spoonfuls of Mayo. Draining the tins of tuna of the excess spring water, I added them to the tub, and mashed it all up thoroughly. Then, I added about 4 pineapple rings, cut into chunks. That'll last me a few days, then I'll break out the rest of the tuna and pineapple and make another batch. Sorted.
Now it was time for breakfast. I remembered my resolution: Water and fruit. I filled a pint glass with water, downed it, and ate two plums. It felt really good. I don't think it felt particularly filling, but the fact that I'd made what I thought was a significant change was pretty uplifting.
I packed my lunch (yes, it did include a Mars bar), and headed out to work.
As per my routine, I had my apple whilst out on my morning round, and when I got back to base, I resisted the urge to go to ASDA, my favourite supermarket. Instead, I ate my tuna on Ryvita, then I ate my Mars bar, and then I went and cleaned my van. Yeah, you should see the engine bay now - gleaming.
The afternoon round was pretty uneventful, and I got home as the heavens opened. It was lashing it down. Now, Wife and I were going out on the night, and as Dog had been cooped up all day, I had to take him out. So for an hour I trudged around in the wet, over fields, grass and mud, and exhausted both Dog and myself.
Wife arrived home about five minutes after Dog and I, and she put a pizza in the oven whilst I nipped into the shower and had a shave.
I had two slices of pizza (actually, each slice was a quarter, so I should say I had half a pizza, but two slices sounds so much better when you are dieting) and a handful of spicy potato wedges. I don't even like potato wedges, let alone spicy ones, but I was hungry so I ate them.
Oh, I nearly forgot. I was so starvenga when I got home from walking Dog that I raided the cupboards. I found the mother lode. A whole, glorious, unopened bar of ASDA Smart Price Milk Chocolate. The wrapper was unceremoniously removed, the chocolate broken up, and the chocolate inserted into my hungry gob in no uncertain terms.
Anyway, one quick change after food, and we were out. As we were heading back at around nine pm, I suggested to Wife that we detour via McDonalds. She vehemently disagreed, and, like a husband that is truly under the thumb, I meekly obeyed. Disclaimer: I am not under the thumb, I just appreciated the fact that really, McDonalds is not the ideal destination for a man on a diet.
Getting into the house, we started looking for a holiday destination for our upcoming anniversary. We want a 'Staycation' as they're fashionably called now; we're looking for a lodge for two in the heart of England. Anyway, whilst browsing the net for a suitable destination, I slowly munched my way through two slices of toast slathered with Nutella. I know, I know, but it's better than the McDonald's that I was going to get!
We went on Assassin's Creed for a while, as I was now bored of looking for a holiday - I am easily distracted - whilst I had a pint of milkshake for the second night in a row.
So in summary: My food intake was slightly healthier than it has been for a long time, but still there is room for improvement; and I did a mega slog of a walk, which is pretty good where exercise is concerned.
So what do you reckon: When I come to weigh in on Monday, will I have lost, gained, or stayed put?
We'll all find out soon enough!
The Dieting Man.
I got up at around 6.15, as I had tuna to prepare, and a shirt to iron. I was surprised that Dog wasn't barking, but then again, it was early even for him, and he had had a late night on Tuesday. When I went to his cage, he was awake, and looking at me bleary eyed, so I left him in there whilst I pottered around the kitchen, with my tins of John West. I opened two tins, poured some vinegar into a tupperware tub, and added two hefty spoonfuls of Mayo. Draining the tins of tuna of the excess spring water, I added them to the tub, and mashed it all up thoroughly. Then, I added about 4 pineapple rings, cut into chunks. That'll last me a few days, then I'll break out the rest of the tuna and pineapple and make another batch. Sorted.
Now it was time for breakfast. I remembered my resolution: Water and fruit. I filled a pint glass with water, downed it, and ate two plums. It felt really good. I don't think it felt particularly filling, but the fact that I'd made what I thought was a significant change was pretty uplifting.
I packed my lunch (yes, it did include a Mars bar), and headed out to work.
As per my routine, I had my apple whilst out on my morning round, and when I got back to base, I resisted the urge to go to ASDA, my favourite supermarket. Instead, I ate my tuna on Ryvita, then I ate my Mars bar, and then I went and cleaned my van. Yeah, you should see the engine bay now - gleaming.
The afternoon round was pretty uneventful, and I got home as the heavens opened. It was lashing it down. Now, Wife and I were going out on the night, and as Dog had been cooped up all day, I had to take him out. So for an hour I trudged around in the wet, over fields, grass and mud, and exhausted both Dog and myself.
Wife arrived home about five minutes after Dog and I, and she put a pizza in the oven whilst I nipped into the shower and had a shave.
I had two slices of pizza (actually, each slice was a quarter, so I should say I had half a pizza, but two slices sounds so much better when you are dieting) and a handful of spicy potato wedges. I don't even like potato wedges, let alone spicy ones, but I was hungry so I ate them.
Oh, I nearly forgot. I was so starvenga when I got home from walking Dog that I raided the cupboards. I found the mother lode. A whole, glorious, unopened bar of ASDA Smart Price Milk Chocolate. The wrapper was unceremoniously removed, the chocolate broken up, and the chocolate inserted into my hungry gob in no uncertain terms.
Anyway, one quick change after food, and we were out. As we were heading back at around nine pm, I suggested to Wife that we detour via McDonalds. She vehemently disagreed, and, like a husband that is truly under the thumb, I meekly obeyed. Disclaimer: I am not under the thumb, I just appreciated the fact that really, McDonalds is not the ideal destination for a man on a diet.
Getting into the house, we started looking for a holiday destination for our upcoming anniversary. We want a 'Staycation' as they're fashionably called now; we're looking for a lodge for two in the heart of England. Anyway, whilst browsing the net for a suitable destination, I slowly munched my way through two slices of toast slathered with Nutella. I know, I know, but it's better than the McDonald's that I was going to get!
We went on Assassin's Creed for a while, as I was now bored of looking for a holiday - I am easily distracted - whilst I had a pint of milkshake for the second night in a row.
So in summary: My food intake was slightly healthier than it has been for a long time, but still there is room for improvement; and I did a mega slog of a walk, which is pretty good where exercise is concerned.
So what do you reckon: When I come to weigh in on Monday, will I have lost, gained, or stayed put?
We'll all find out soon enough!
The Dieting Man.
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